Forgiveness - Granting or Seeking?

Before I get started on this post, I've decided that the only time I'll blog is when I feel like I've got something to say...and the something to say will be more about the things I'm learning as I endeavour to be a Christ follower. So that being said, when I'm scarce for days or weeks at a time, it's because I haven't learned anything!!

One of the things I'm starting to get is that being a Christ follower takes a huge amount of humility....and humility is not something that comes naturally to us in our fallen states, when we are stuck in the in between of Christlikeness but "not yet". What I mean by that is ...God sees us as His children, totally, completely, and absolutely, we are holy and blameless in His sight...but "not yet" are we actually acting like it. There is work to be done, santification to be carried out, minds to be renewed...our groaning for redemption is still underway...and if you are not groaning for your redemption, check yourself, 'cause something is wrong. Paul says all creation groans for redemption, including ourselves...it ought to be our default position, and if we are not groaning for our redemption then we have become far to complacent and satisfied with our little lives...but I digress.

I heard the other day that the biggest stumbling block to seeing my dreams come true is my unforgiveness to those who have harmed me. This can and often is true. Nothing wrong with this statement. I believe it.

And.
But.

As I lay on my bed last night, contemplating it, something struck me. Why is the focus on who has harmed me, and who do I need to forgive? Should not the focus be "Who have I harmed, and who do I need to seek forgiveness from?"

Why do we think it is our forgiveness that needs to be granted when more probably it is forgiveness that we need to seek?

Is it because we each think we are more righteous then we really are?

Is it because in our defensive, self protective, fallen natures, we are quick to remember the harm done against us, and just as quick to forget (or justify) the harm we have done to others?

I keep a record of harms and wrongs done to me...and then worry that if I want my prayer answered, I best get busy and forgive those who have harmed and wronged me.....but do I keep a record of the harms and wrongs I do to others? And does it ever occur to me that if I want my prayer answered, I'd best get busy and go make it right? And on that note, why is the motivation to either grant forgiveness or seek forgiveness rooted in getting my dream met or my prayer answered? Should there be no motive at all, except the love I proclaim to have for God my Father, and my Lord Jesus Christ? Who's kingdom am I truly living for anyway, His or mine?

Do we take the holy high road and deign and condenscend to GRANT forgiveness so our dreams are met, or do we walk a path of humility....gingerly.... carefully, because the beam in our own eye has in fact blinded us, and we can not see that we each probably need to be forgiven far more then we ever need to forgive.

In our falleness, we deceive ourselves better then anyone can ever deceive us, especially when we have been wronged. We tend to see ourselves as the good guy, the innocent victim while the other is the bad guy, and this is our stumbling block. It is the sense that I am right, usually right, or almost always right, and the other needs to get with the program, that is my stumbling block. It is the belief that I am a spiritual hero when I grant forgiveness that is my stumbling block. It is the demanding, self righteous attitude of my heart that is my stumbling block. My inability to grant forgiveness does not and never will trip me up near as much as my inability to seek it. We tend to believe that granting forgiveness is the better thing, only because we tend to believe we never NEED to seek it from others, near as much as others HAVE to seek it from us..

And think about it...if each of us were as aware of the harms we have done to others as we are of the harms that have been done to us..and I mean TRULY aware...then each of us would seek forgiveness and all of us would be granting it...and the world would know Him by our love.